MY BIG, FAT, SHAMELESS PLUG

What up Internet? I posted last week...I'm posting again this week...its a beautiful thing so far (let's ignore the timestamp and the fact that I'm CLEARLY writing this at work on my mid-afternoon procrastination break...count your blessings eh?). I was going to write a post about a new (weird) dimension of JP's relationship with our cat Dean, but in light of some recent events in a dear friend's life, I've decided to go with this entry instead. Skip ahead about 3 paragraphs if you just want to come to the point of all this!

If you know me at all, you know that I'm on a pretty much endless quest to lose weight/tone up/not be a fat slob. Though I've always been a near perfect representation of the stunning German brick-house physique, at one point I KNOW that I was able to wear clothes in the single digit size range. At one point in my life my mid-section could have been described as "petite" and the term "thunder thighs" applied to me in a minimal way. Then I was dumped by a high school boyfriend, ate my feelings, went to college, discovered the many joys of alcohol, and generally dove head first down the slippery slope of lazy 20somethinghood. I have been off and on weight watchers more times than I care to remember, made countless resolutions (and attempts!) to hit the gym regularly, and generally vow each month that THIS is the month I'm going to get in shape. Sob sob sob, cry me a river, I'm such a fatty, PLEASE LOVE ME ANYWAYS...I clearly use humor (poorly) as a defense mechanism to deal.

So the other day I'm waddling through the Target plus-size section armed with a candy bar and Styrofoam cup of gravy (Did she actually do this? Do she really drink gravy? Dear God must she really buy plus sized clothes?? Is this two truths and a lie?...well I'm not going to tell you because I think its funnier that way!!!), it hit me that I'm preparing to marry someone with serious political aspirations, meaning that at some point in my adult life I may be expected to look presentable on camera or meet important people. This thought scared me so much I dropped my beverage/gravy all over a rack of stretch pants! I said to myself, "Jill, not only are you awkward as all hell, but you're kind of a pudgy tomboy too!!! It's time to PULL IT TOGETHER WOMAN...and probably time to stop talking to yourself in the midst of Target!"

After being kicked out of Target, (for real? is she lying?) I went straight home and registered for the first (flattest) 5K race in the District I could find. I know what you're thinking,
"Jill, do you even know how long a 5k is?"
"Jill, do you know that you're expected to RUN?"
"Jill, why do you continue to make rash decisions without thinking them through at all?"
My answer to all of your skeptical questions is YES (3.1 Miles), YES (I'm training ALMOST regularly), and I have no idea, but I'm giving it a go anyways! I may end up looking like a total tool, but maybe I'll actually start to get in shape after 7 years of putting it off. Maybe as a result someday, I won't totally disgust important person that JP's job requires us to dine with. Maybe my asthma will eat up my lungs by mile two...who knows?? It will be quite the adventure though...


HERE'S THE IMPORTANT PART!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I'll be running in the Race For Hope 5k on May 1st, in downtown Washington DC. The Race for Hope is a big fundraiser for the National Brain Tumor Society, and in addition to getting my butt in shape for this, I'm trying to raise a small amount of money for them. If you can find it in your heart (wallet) to donate a little to my cause, I'd be eternally grateful. To do so, please go to my personal page http://www.braintumorcommunity.org/goto/jillianwarne and follow the instructions there. Seriously...even if its like a dollar every bit helps. Thanks for all the support everyone!!!

Tune in next week when I describe how JP, the cat, and tuna fish all combine to make my life a little more ridiculous...

Love,
Jill